last day at Malifax.

its currently 7.56pm. I'm in the office right now, doing my last OT on my last day of my 3 months attachment at Malifax. I'm supposed to be picking up calls and helping people with love but surprisingly this Friday night, phone calls doesn't seem to be coming in. Anyway, I'm sort of having some mixed emotions as im typing this, flashbacks running through my mind constantly.

I still remember the very first day I came for work, not knowing anyone in this office, other than my attachment partner. Everyone seemed so cool and cold blooded, how cool is that. Anyway, I just served my last walked-in customer and oh, Ms Cindy just popped by and said "Good luck Shiwei, all the best !" Oh well, all this is kinda making me feel abit sad about leaving. But anyway, thats just how it is isn't it, people come and go, part and parcel of life, blablabla.

I would say that for the 3 months I was here, tons of things happened, be it at work or not. It was definitely one of the most difficult phase of my life. Well, i managed to pull through and still smile every night before i sleep and every morning before i leave for work. Honestly speaking, I was dreading work in the beginning stages and i wished that the 3 months would end at the speed of light. And strangely, on this very official last day at work, i wondered. I was never a person like this, and I seriously don't know whats going on.

Touching on that, actually I was never a person who knows what exactly I want. I lived my life day from day, day to day, day by day. I know I was happy in the past, well, not exactly that happy, but certainly much happier than I am now. I mean, I am very contented about what I already have now, but I know theres still something lacking, and its always been like this.

I guess time flew past too quietly and cruelly. I was never good at goodbyes, and I know I never will be, if you can actually catch what I really meant. Ahh, this post is craps, bye.

prawn.

ytd night was prawning at feng's farm.

see te guy in that gay red singlet?

yeah, hes the young-boss of the farm.

we waited and waited and waited...

then ben shouted "hoi hoi hoiii prawnn lehhhh !!"

damn fucking funny i tell you.

anyway ben is the botak.

thats me, concentrating.

actually i was very sad coz i caught only like 4 prawns.
anyway prawning is fun, real fun.
heres a picture of ben's leg in the fish spa thingy.
i swear theres fucking alot of fishes. scary.

okay bye.

2/3 done with IPP.

d-day

i am very tired.

tired about thinking of all the shit.

too much going on recently.

i am very tired.

week 7 of IPP.

attachment pretty much sucked. doing the same shit everyday and saying the same few sentences over and over is seriously driving me up the wall. been covering up peoples' asses and its doing me no good at all. i hate they way people do things but all i can do is just keep my mouth shut. ive never been sure of what i actually want. its like a standstill, and i wish time could actually stop for a while for me to have more fresh air. ive been missing school, like seriously. nowadays i think back about my life in poly and i tend to smile to myself, weird.

i miss my buddies in sch, L and F. i can still recall countless times where by i screwed up and how L never fails to help me cover my ass and at the end of the day, we'll still laugh like crazy together. but he screws me up too at times but i dont give a shit about that coz i'll gladly cover his like how he always did about mine. F has always been the listening ear and she still is. she takes almost all the nonsense and craps i give and in return, she gives me hers so i think its perfectly fair. shes the one im so used to talking to whenever im confused or whenever i needed to sort out some thoughts. shes the brain. i rmb looking forward about going to sch coz i know i have L and F with me. but time passed too soon too quietly and too cruelly so we went our seperate ways, into different specialized paths. we dont see each other anymore. well, i guess thats life. but, at times, i still think of both of yall and smile. i dont really know why, may be its coz 3 of us are just mad.

ive been feeling really frustrated and pissed without any reason recently. i hope i'll be back to normal pretty soon coz this isnt exactly a good feeling. ive been lacking sleep major and ive been dreaming alot about the past. people say, you dream coz you think. im not sure. i hope those shit aint coming back coz i know its gonna screw me up again. goodnight.